Dear Sadichha,
I am 21-year-old girl. I grew up in a very traditional family. Despite of the conservative thoughts of my parents, I managed to complete my high school. But now they are planning to get me married. I feel like running away from home now but I can’t run away from them as well. I have decided to work for now. I am trying to convince them. I don’t know what actually I should tell them so that they halt the marriage for now. Please help.
You just tell them what you are telling me; that you don’t want to get married now and the reason for a girl’s existence is so much more than just getting married! If we run every time we face a problem in life, we will always be running, my dear. So, face this problem head on. Especially because they are your parents, I feel they will be able to understand where you are coming from. I also feel like when someone else is advocating for you they might also look at this situation differently. If you have any elder sisters/cousins, and if they come and talk to your parents I think that will also make a difference. Bear in mind that the cousin advocating for you should be well educated. Talk to your parents about your dreams and aspirations and how you would like to move forward in life.
Dear Sadichha,
I am a 27-year-old guy from Butwal. Currently, I am working as a cashier at an organization that will soon collapse. I have been trying to apply for many other jobs. But because of my lesser qualification I could not get any. I need to work in order to be independent and help my family members. But the situation is getting tougher by the day. I feel like continuing my studies but I think of my expenses again and drop my plan to study. I am quite stressed and can’t think what to do next. Please suggest me.
It is definitely a challenging situation that you are in. It’s never too late to study and where there is a will there is a way. I suggest you look out for options in studies because your lack of qualifications will be a problem in the future too. I am sure government and public colleges will be more affordable compared to private colleges. Don’t look at the immediate expenses, but the value you will earn over time. I believe you can also just register for the exams and study on your own with the help of guide books and then appear for the exam privately. Don’t be disheartened to keep looking for opportunities. Maybe let them know that you have plans to continue your studies and that you will not disappoint them. You can also ask around in your family and friends circle to see if they can help you in any way with recommendations for job opportunities.
Heart to heart with Sadichha: Learn to embrace your differences
Dear Sadichha,
I am studying nursing in one of the colleges in India. I am 23. I moved here to study three years ago. My internship started now and I am paid well for my work. It’s going good here so I am hardly considering returning home to my parents now. However, they have been expecting my return. I have friends here but I have to go back to my family. I feel nostalgic in either ways. How do I overcome it?
You are still young, so I feel you can explore the opportunities there. What would you like to do eventually? If you see yourself settling down in India then you can work there and continue further studies there itself. However, if you plan to come back to Nepal, eventually you can come back now and explore opportunities here. Transition phase is always tricky. You don’t want to leave the place you are currently at but also want to be home. There are always mixed emotions involved. So, I suggest you think for yourself and what you want. Parents, family and friends will always have expectations from us. But in the end it’s our decisions that shape our lives for our self. So, ask the hard questions to yourself and you will find the answers.
Dear Sadichha,
I am a 19-year-old girl. I came to know a guy online four months ago. We chat daily and have started to like each other. I feel easy talking to him but my friends warn me to keep a limit as social media can’t be fully trusted. A few days ago he proposed to me and I could not say no because I also like him. However, I wanted to meet him and we met as well. It wasn’t as scary as my friends were telling but the first meeting was a little awkward. Now, I am fed with these skeptical thoughts by people around me. Is everyone we meet online wicked and bad?
There is no definite answer to the question you have asked. Not all people you meet online are wicked and bad but then again, you never know. Sometimes even the people you meet personally or through friends or even family turn out to be wicked and bad. So, I cannot give you a concrete answer. But what I will say is to use your intuition and gut feeling. Don’t be annoyed with your friends who tell you to be careful, they are only saying so because they care for you. You have already started a relationship in four month’s time, so I suggest you to go slow. Get some time to really know each other, your likes and ideals, friends and family. In the online world, people often become who they want other people to believe they are and that is not always their real self. It takes time to build a solid foundation for any relationship. So, make sure you take that time. Don’t rush.
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